Firmly Implanted

Rooted. Sensation. Happiness. Wholeness. Thankful. Blessed. Lucky. Opportunities. Discovery. The way my feet feel on carpet. The way my feet feel in your bed. Rooted. Finally. Wandering not for the sake of being lost, but for the sake of discovery. Carpet. Wood. Cold metal bar. Warm wood floor. Lines. Age spots. Mother's hands. Safety. Wise. All-knowing yet so eager to learn. Teaching for the sake of sharing love. Wholeness. Laughter. Non-awkward silences. Long-distance relationships. Tracing. Non-accepting floor. Absorption. The ability to walk on chairs. You make my insides feel the sunshine. Time is lost. Never before have I felt like the time was flying by and it was still well spent. Organizing myself. Exploring myself. Feeling ok with myself. Feeling ok to be myself. Touch. Touch. Touch. Pattern. Patternless. Excitement. Conflict. How my mind tells my body what to do. Voices of limbs. Jealousy between body parts. No one should be that excited unless they see cupcakes. Dad. Father. My father is in a wheelchair. He needs walked. Don't they know the beauty of weight, the beauty of feet on a surface? Your feet support you. Cold feet. I don't think about marriage with you. Because I'm not scared of the future. You make my soul feel safe. Secure in whatever will be. Secure in your arms. Secure in your six-foot-four-ness. Basketball Jones. Space Jam poster. Pure complexity of feelings. Funny faces, faces facing the sun, with you. Point on Park Avenue. Skipping class. Your presence affects me. Your touch affects me. Anxiety. Nervous to be around new people. Nervous to touch those who look judgmental. Happiness runs in a circular motion. I continue to be upset with you. Infinite possibilities. Runs runs. Sunshine soaking up my heart. Clouds don't bring me down. Do you believe you belong in the clouds? That you are so much better than us? Hurt. I know it hurts. Risk of rebound. Trusting your goodness. Wholesome. Totally complete yet non-consuming. Supportive. In love with my smile. In love with your nuzzle. Very cool. You sweat when you sleep. Is that your sweat or mine? HA! You snore. But the sleep I use because of it, I don't consider lost, but spent accepting an adorable, uncontrollable bodily function. Writing about moving. Writing about my soul healing, painting a new life. Always being watched. Mommy!!!! Kitty!!! My cat has hyperthyroidism. She will live to be 40. Two week depression. Basically my sister. Best friend. Puffy face. Tattooed beauty. I don't think you're a whore. I love you. I love life!